Too lazy for a whole story here's a bunny or two
by Secret-H
Summary: Do you like Awesome!Harry? I do. If you ask me Canon!Harry was a bit too Nobel & Good & Realistic. I like my Harry to be kickass no matter what he's doing. And he likes variety. Subject: Alternate Universe Harry. Rated T, because I also like to swear.
1. There might be worse, but I doubt it

**This is my first post, so treat me kindly. I'm going to start with a one shot. Enjoy.**

**So in this scene they're at the Grimmauld Place and an Alternate Harry has some how made his way there to their dimension. All he wants is a little help, but it doesn't seem likely that that will be happening any time soon.  
Harry is 15, he is also technically AU and OOC. Alternate Harry is 20-ish give or take a year. His dimension was a violent one.**

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**Alternate!BAMF!Shouting!Pissy!Harry**  
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"So what you seem to be saying is I'm in an alternate universes," said Alternate Harry, "where some people exist, who definitely did not in mine," (glares at Sirius) "and you have no idea how to get me back?"

"Alternate reality, but essentially yes," said Dumbledore, smiling that annoying grandfatherly smile of his.

"Are you serious?" Alternate Harry who in lue of shrieking (very unmanly, no matter how much he wanted to) shouted.

"No, I'm-"

"Listen, I don't know you, and I am feeling pretty glad about that right now." Said Alternate Harry, voice flat. "But I have only been here for a couple of hours, and if I hear that goddamn pun one more goddamn time I will be sorely tempted to kill you." Snape, who was sitting quietly in the corner, smirked. This Potter seemed a lot better than the one they had.

"But-" said Sirius.

"I will **beat** you to **Death**!"

"Now, my boys_," "I am not your boy._" "there is no need to get worked up," Dumbledore said, smiling happily, as he chose to ignore Alternate Harry's grumblings. He slipped his dreaded silk pouch from the pocket his purple robe. "I am sure everything will work out if we all calm down and work together. Perhaps a lemon dr-"

"Enough with the fucking candy already, dammit!" Alternate Harry finally allowed himself to shriek. "What the hell is wrong with you? What the fuck is wrong with this whole goddamned uni- excuse me, reality? Does your Voldemort dress in drag to? I bet he has hair that would make a Malfoy jealous."

"Now there's no reason to use such language- " Molly Weasley began, but was swiftly interrupted by an incredulous Alternate Harry (who seems to be in that state more and more since he arrived.)

"My language?" Alternate Harry had finished resisting any and all temptations and was definitely letting loose his many decibels. "Bitch, I have been ripped through the very space time continuum, to an alternate _reality_ filled with what very well seems like pussies, idiots, and sheeple, and your getting on me about my LANGUAGE!"

"Now, now," said Dumbledore, finally taking it upon himself to intervene. He reached over to put a solemn hand on Alternate Harry's shoulder, not removing it even as it was glared at hard enough to feel. "I'm sure if we all just calm down, work together, and have a little candy, we can-"

"Get your pedophilic hand off me, Barney." Alternate Harry said icily, finally fed up and ready to kill someone. "You know I was maybe contemplating helping you annoying bastards, but I have come to the rather firm conclusion that you people really don't deserve it. The mere fact that you let this bastard around your children, much less let him rule over a _school_, is a testimony to that. I kind of hope you die at this point, and I can only be filled with pity that this Harry is going to have put down your rabid dark lord for you at what is the kindness off his apparently saintly heart."

"Oh don't be," Harry said deciding now to speak. "I was really planning on taking my godfather, Remus, my not inconsiderable assets, and my primarily male (but also female) harem out of this country, and leaving them all to rot."

There was a lengthy silence as everyone took a few moments to take that in, in which time most of the rooms jaws, (and hopes) dropped. Dumbledore stood frozen, and Snape (who's vision of the "Golden boy" had been quite thoroughly shattered) made some quick travel plans. All the while Harry smiled quite innocently, and Alternate Harry could only blink repeatedly, suddenly feeling rather awkward.

"Well…good on you then." Alternate Harry said. He coughed lightly into his fist. "So, a harem? Aren't you a bit young for that?"

Everyone turned to look at Harry because he was only 15 after all and, really a lot of them had stopped listening at harem, missing the key point of his statement. Harry merely raised an eyebrow slowly, looking at him benignly.

"They are expecting me to murder someone in cold blood, and I did kill my first year teacher with my literal bare hands." Harry looked at Alternate Harry almost kindly, as if he were the naïve boy and Harry was the wise veteran who had seen all the world had to offer. This world anyway. "Old enough to kill, old enough to fuck."

"Ah," was all Alternate Harry could say to that and turned to Dumbledore who had yet to move. It was best to change the subject. "Anyway, I hope you have a way to get me back home. You people are too fucked up for me to have to deal with this shit for the rest of my life." But Dumbledore still hadn't moved, Snape was nowhere to be found and the sheeple were daze and aimless without their Sheppard. He turned back to Harry.

"I don't suppose you-"

"Of course, I'll help," Harry said standing up from the kitchen table. "You'll learn not too expect much from them." He grabbed Alternate Harry's arm and, with a nod and wave to both Sirius and Remus, dragged the poor alternate from the room.

"This only ever happens to me." Alternate Harry lamented, as he was pulled along. Harry just looked at him and smiled (funny how the lighting made it look rather like a smirk), tugging all the while.

"Don't be silly, it happens to me all the time."


	2. Time Traveled, deaged, Hufflepuff Harry

**I'm Back! Mooooooo! I know I haven't touched this for a while, but now I have, and it feels goo. It turned out being longer than I thought it would, but that's okay.  
****So the premise of this story is...well its in the chapter, but I'll repeat it any way.**

**For some reason, in some way that I never mention Harry was transported to the past and de-aged. He joined Tom Riddle at the orphanage and they've been together ever since. Harry's a bit OOC, but he always will be the way I write him.**

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**Time-Travel!Deaged!Hufflepuff!Future-changing!Tom-Riddle-Saving!Harry**  
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_Tommy's been acting weird_, Harry thought as he walked through Hogwart's halls.

It was getting dark outside, though that was to be expected so close to winter. It probably wasn't more than 5 o' clock. Still, it was dark, classes started again tomorrow, and he hadn't actually done his homework yet.

Really, Harry hadn't done much of anything all weekend. He had been too busy worrying about what was wrong with Tom. Tommy had been quiet for days on end, (which admittedly wasn't all that weird) and been switching between, annoyingly clingy and coldly detached. It wasn't the stable and slightly chill Tommy that Harry had grown up with and he was wary of it. This was, after all, the possible future Dark Lord he was talking about. Harry had done his best to curb Tom's more sadistic and homicidal impulses, but apparently, nature played a part in it as much as nurture. _Tommy is definitely not light natured. _

Harry continued to walk, making his way to the Hufflepuff common room. He hoped Tom would be there so that they could talk, (and he could procrastinate more. Honestly, it wasn't that he couldn't do the work, after all, he was mentally-what was it: 34/5 now. He just didn't want to take the time. Calm him a lazy Gryffindor, but damn, 20 ft. on the increased powers of runes during the winter solstice was freakin' ridiculous, not to mention tedious as hell.)

_**{Page Break}**_

6 years, and Harry still couldn't believe it. Not because he was in Hufflepuff as much as because _Tom Marvolo Riddle _was in Hufflepuff. To be sure, he had only entered the house because he had wanted to follow Harry, but Harry had definitely choked when after five minutes, (two minutes shorter than his seven,) of debate, (cf. argument) the hat had grunted out a reluctant sounding Hufflepuff. Tommy had walked up to their table disappointed, disgruntle, but desperately relieved **(AN: Alliteration:P****) **and sat down next to Harry. He had even hugged him. It was in that moment that Harry realized just how much that Tommy cared for him. It was a shock to say the least, possibly the biggest one of that day.

Harry had been perfectly willing to let them drift apart as the years went on. He would watch Tom, to make sure he didn't do anything too bad, (like commit murder?) but for the most part, they didn't need to be too close. He liked Tommy and everything, but they didn't really have too much in common apart from the obvious. It was sad, but not that sad.

Yet Tommy wanted to stay with Harry, which, (in Harry's older and a little more jaded mind,) was just fucking adorable. And rather creepy, but Harry was willing to go with it. At least he wasn't in Slytherin, which was good… Right?

It had seemed pretty good to Harry. Hufflepuffs were nice fluffy marshmallow-like people. They were polite, shy, and generally well dispositioned. Sure they were a bit sheeple-y and had their fair share of assholes, but everyone did.

Harry had forgotten, one thing however. Something he personally hadn't really experienced, but was more or less known to everyone else.

Hufflepuffs were loyal. More than Gryffindors, and a hell of a lot more than Slytherins.

The thing about Slytherin house was that they were all ambitious and looking out for number one. And by number one, I mean themselves. There was no real sense of trust or unity that was not simply a guard against the world, and usually very temporary. Hufflepuffs did not have that problem. They gave each other all of their loyalty, and in most situations, would go against their own beliefs to help a friend. Especially if that friend was a fellow Hufflepuff. Which one Tom Marvolo Riddle happened to be. An unforeseen problem.

_Tommy has the poor Fluffs wrapped around his finger, and I have to deal with it. _

_**{Page Break}**_

Harry let out a low moan as he trudged down the stairs. He considered getting something from the kitchen, (which rather close to the Hufflepuff dorm, and probably why they tended to be on the plumper side,) but decided against it. It would be dinner in a couple of hours and it wasn't like he was hungry anyway; just bored. Bored enough to eat. Still, if he ate now he wouldn't eat as much when dinner came, and then Tommy wouldn't leave him alone. _I'm not too skinny and short. I'm just lean, and a little vertically challenged. _

It was just as much as a surprise and disappointment to Harry, who had thought his lack of stature was the fault of the Dursleys. Not that the orphanage was all that much better, especially in this time. Still, he was expecting some kind of improvement, but nothing. At most he had a tan…as much of a tan as one could get in England.

Fate, the fucking whore, had also been kind enough to fix Harry's vision. _All the better to hunt you down with and kick your ass, you bitch._

_**{Page Break}**_

The Hufflepuffs were nice though. They were very accepting of things. Like the fact that Tom didn't really act like a Hufflepuff. He was too charismatic and smart, and even if they did not see it, manipulative. They accepted the fact that Harry was a lazy bastard, even though Hufflepuffs should have been harder working. (They were definitely more accepting than Tom who thought that he should work to the best of his ability. Not that was an actual option; Harry knew spells, potions, and events that had not happened yet. It was pretty hard to down play(cast) a spell, but it was easier when one simply did not do it. The teachers were under the impression that Harry was a possible genius, who was just too lazy to put any real effort into his work. Which was not untrue.) The Hufflepuffs had gotten over most of their more bizarre habits. Even the fact that they slept in the same bed.

Not like that, of course, but they had always slept together. Ever since Harry had finally gotten to Tommy, after _a whole freakin' year_ of living in the orphanage, he had rarely ever let Harry out of his sight. Tommy had slept in his bed to give and receive comfort from when they were six, and he didn't stop when they got to Hogwarts: something else that had surprised Harry. The Hufflepuffs had been slightly less accepting, when they realized that Tom and Harry **(AN: HEHHAHA) **were not brothers, or even related. (Harry couldn't blame them for the mistake. Tom and Harry had very few differences between them. Tom's hair was straighter and his eyes cobalt. Harry's hair was spikier and his eyes a deep green. Everything else was a bit eerily similar.) Still, they had gotten over it after Harry had explained. _Not that Tommy tried to help at all. The bastard._

_**{Page Break}**_

_Back on topic, Harry. Tommy. _Tom was acting out of character. It had taken Harry a while to notice, but that was because he had been busy with…stuff.

Okay, so maybe he hadn't really been paying attention. Hell, even the few Gryffindor friends that Harry had had noticed before him and were tactless enough to point it out. This made Harry more determined to nip this problem at the bud. Or stem. Stock? He would rip the damn flower from the ground, okay?

Harry had finally made it to the Hufflepuff opening, which was a rather innocuous looking door. He grabbed the handle and let himself in. (Never let it be said that the Puffs were overly complicated folk. On the first day, the door was set to recognize them, and it stayed that way unless they were "programmed" out. It was also unnoticeable by those who did not already know where it was.) There weren't many people in the common room, but they were probably out actually doing something. Harry let himself into the room that he and Tommy shared with two other students, and flopped down on the bed. He let out a sigh as he prepared his speech and lay there, waiting.

_**{Page Break}**_

Tom saw possibility in everyone. That is to say that he saw use in everybody. Hufflepuff was not just home for the losers of the school. Like the hat said, Hufflepuff took "the rest". This left the house with a wide variety of skills that were rarely ever used, because no one paid them any attention. Well, Tommy wasn't one to waste talent and he saw this treasure trove for what it was. He also loved that he was the only one who did, it made it easier for him to establish himself.

The dorm mates loved him and he wasn't above using that to his advantage. It wasn't like he couldn't get just as much power working with them as with the Slytherins. The Hufflepuffs had just as many purebloods and families as the other house, if not more. They simply were not as famous for sticking their neck out for the light or dark. Hufflepuffs were the support, the majority, and the ones you convinced and, or bribed to get them to vote for you. They were the ones who would remember your name and face 20 years from now no matter where you went, and Tommy wanted that for himself. Harry had resigned himself to the fact that instead of a Dark Lord Voldemort, there was going to be a Minister Thomas Riddle.

He could only hope that that was a good thing.

_**{Page Break}**_

Harry had fallen asleep and when he was awakened by Tom, there was no light coming through the windows at all. _Pretty late then_, he thought sleepily before smiling softly upwards. He couldn't see Tom's face in the dark.

"Morning, Tommy boy." He said rolling over to turn on the lamp. Harry never thought he would be grateful for the wizarding world's backwardsness, but it had its uses. Despite the fact that he was 7 decades in the past, he didn't really have to adjust, because the whole society had been stagnant for more that a century even before this time period. "Why ya hanging out in the dark?"

"It's 7 pm, Hadrian. Do not call me that, and get up. It is time for supper."

"Oh," Harry said before laying back down and on his stomach. "Then go away, and let me sleep. I can eat later. And I said to call me Harry. How long have we known each other exactly?"

Tom rolled his eyes and proceeded pick Harry and off their bed with a spell, dropping him on the floor. "No, you are going to eat now, and I will not call you by such an insipid name when your proper one is fine." Harry lay on the floor moaning and flapping about on his back, much to Tom's irritation. He sneered down at him poking him with his foot. "Why are you even in here at this time? If you wanted to hide, you have numerous other locations that would not be the first place that I might stop by."

There was that look again. Tom always had a reason to sneer at Harry, but not with such a cold look. Even though he was facing in Harry's direction, Tom's eyes avoided him. And then Harry remembered. _Why am I here again? _

_Oh, right! _

"Tommy~" Harry exclaimed, spring up abruptly. Tom just barely managed to get out of his way. "I had wanted to talk to you about something?"

Tom simply raised an eyebrow in enquiry.

"Is everything okay?" Harry said looking up into Tommy's face with a concerned vistage. "You've been acting a little out of it, and some people from the other houses have noticed." _Before than me even. _

"Yes, everything is fine," Tom said after a few moments of silence. "My mind has simply been preoccupied. Now, supper."

He grabbed Harry's arm pulling him closer, as he made his way to the door. There it was again. From cold to too close in a matter of minutes, seconds even. Yes, now that Harry noticed, Tom's behavior was a little worrying. _Something must be going on. _Harry had asked around, but all he got were strange or even incredulous looks. It was puzzling and more than a little frustrating. What could they know that he didn't? Harry stopped, grabbing on to Tom's arm.

"Tom, you know you can tell me anything right?" Harry asked in a serious voice.

"Oh?"

"Really, Tommy!" Harry said in earnest. "You know I care about you. I want you to be happy." _For everyone's sake._

Tom look away and his face was hidden by the shadow. "You care about me?" Tom asked slowly, as if he were tasting every word.

"Of course." Of course Harry did. There was no way that he couldn't with all of the time that they spent together, no matter why he started their 'friendship'.

Tommy looked down. Out of the light of the lamp, he still couldn't see Tom's face clearly, but the look in his eyes was intense. They shined darkly with a light that made Harry almost wanted to shrink back. Still Tom's voice was distant and nonchalant when he asked curiously. "Do you love me?"

Harry paused. _What? Do I love him?_ That wasn't really something he had thought about. Sure he had developed an affection for Tom over the years. He likened himself to the drop out, jaded, but cool older brother in their relationship. Tom kept him from completely giving up on life, and he kept that stick in Tom's ass from getting stuck, ( and, you know, kept him from going crazy). Did love factor in there? Maybe.

"I think so."

"You think so?" Tom said pulling back slightly. He frowned and suddenly this felt a lot more important than before. Harry could see that he was at a turning point, and quite possibly the future of the world hung on his words_. Dammit! I don't need this. _But he thought again. Really, what did Harry know about love? Had he ever found the time to experience it, or even acknowledge it before that person was taken away? He didn't want that happening to Tom.

Wait, he didn't?

No, he didn't. Tom had become important to him. The thought of him dying gave Harry a pain in his chest. Maybe not as strong as it would have been with Ron or Hermione or Sirius, but it was there. Did he love Tommy?

"Yes," Harry said suddenly, making Tommy jump slightly. Tom was not Lord Voldemort, nor would he ever be. (Even if he did decided to go all evil, there was no way Harry was going to let him chose something so stupid sounding. His Dark Lord name would be something badass, like Ash, or Darker, or something.) Tom was a precious person of Harry's now, the only one he had left. Harry looked up with a cheeky smile. "Yeah, I love you Tommy boy. Of course I do. How could I not when your always so fecking adorable?"

There was a silence before Tommy leaned down showing his face in the light and smiled so sweetly. It looked strangely natural on his face. _Oh yeah, Fucking Adorable._

"I love you too." He said, and Harry was shocked, possibly more shocked than he had ever been in his life. So shocked in fact, that he didn't notice Tom's face moving closer to his until their lips had met. In a kiss. _Tommy is kissing me. Tom Fucking Marvolo Fucking Riddle AKA Dark Fucking Lord Fucking Voldemort, is Fucking kissing me…_

_He's rather good at this._

Tom pulled away and, pressing their foreheads together, smiled that delighted smile again. "I love you, Harry."

"…"

He pulled back completely taking a deep breath, and letting it out slowly. Tom quickly turned away and ran-jogged-speed walked to the door of the bedroom where he paused. "Don't think this has gotten you out of eating. I expect to see you in the great hall in 5 minutes." Then he left, closing the door behind him with a sharp click and Harry was left there staring into nothing. It took his brain several more minutes to process what just happened.

_Well…_

…

…

…

_Shit!_


	3. Back, to another Dimension, Oops

**MOOOOOOOOO! First of all, let me say, that I do not ever want to write something this long again. I know that it's only 7700 words, but this is like a whole freakin story for me. I'm lazy okay, read the title. As it happens, I cut some things out. You will notice because I skipped around, like a lot. I'm going to use the line thingy to break my page. This mostly signifies timeskips, but also relates to changes in POV, or a scene. This story is missing a lot of filler, and would basically be incomplete, but I doubt that I will ever right a sequel.**  
**So the plot is on my profile, but in case you do not want to read that: Harry goes to an alternate universe. He shows up a year earlier than causes significant changes to the Potterverse. There are some contradictions and holes, but I really don't care enough to fix them. Make of it what you will. It's more of an outline with story, anyway. Very lackadaisical. Sorry for any mistakes.**

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**Alternate!De-aged!Hufflepuff!Neutral!Grey!Harry**  
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The war took a bit longer than planned. Not that anything was planned at that point. Harry thought that he could tell exactly when everything went off course.

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Dumbledore had lived, and while that should have been a good thing, it made things just that bit more difficult. Secrets that should have been known, would have been known, had been kept quiet. Harry had wanted to go and search for the horuxes, but noooooooo. Only Albus Dumbledore could do that. Never mind that Dumbles had a very busy schedule. Never mind that at such a slow pace Voldemort was bound to notice pieces of his _soul_ being destroyed; and even if he didn't, he would check on them at some point. None of that mattered, because Albus Dumbledore was still alive, (if with one less appendage,) and still in control ,and Harry had to be young for just a little while longer.

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Well, he did go to school that year, but he was not going to waste it turning mice into teacups, (or silver spoons, though that one was a bit useful.) Harry got his training, even if he had to do it himself. The Room of Requirements was no longer a viable option, but as it happens, nobody thought of doing anything about the Chamber of Secrets, which proved to be wonderfully useful.

Harry went through his annual battle to the possible death, survived, and proceeded to graduate.

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Harry had been happy, if only because he had made it out of Hogwarts alive. Now he wasn't really sure what to do with himself. He had thought of being a Auror, but didn't think of ever going through with it, especially with the whole being under Ministry control thing. He was just floating, because really, what could he do with his life with Voldemort still out there?

Ron and Hermione were busy with their whole relationship, plus Hermione being pregnant which added a bit of strain. He and Ginny were not going to happen. He saw her as too much of a friend, and Ginny, after finally getting with him, realized that he wasn't what she really wanted. They didn't hate each other, they just had nothing in common. Harry finally decided to start with looking for those Horuxes, and he took Neville, (who's grandmother had recently passed away,) and Draco, (who was on the run after his whole fallout from the death eaters, and the murder of his parents,) with him. On the way he gained some skills, because there was a lot of down time, and apparently purebloods kept a lot of old magics to themselves. Neville was willing to share, and Malfoy was less willing, but did anyway. Harry, in turn, shared some of the even more obscure magics, considered ancient even when Slytherin was hiding them away.

Of course, finding the Horuxes had been no easy task, though getting them had not been as hard as originally thought. Once the guys knew what they were, it had been relatively easy. Bellatrix had suffered death by Weasley leaving all of the Lestrange assets to Harry, the Lord Black. Harry had had the pleasure of ripping the Slytherin necklace from Umbridge's thick neck when she stopped sympathizing and went down showing her true colors.

Everything had worked out well enough.

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The war ended, but life went on, sometimes for better, sometimes for worse. Hermione and Ron were happy, Ginny and Dean were together again, Draco and Neville had bonded at some point on their adventure. People had died, like Dumbledore finally kicking the bucket in an amazing (and flashy) battle against no less than 30 death eaters, solidifying himself as one of the best wizards of all time, (and eternally bad ass in the words of one Fred Weasley). It wasn't a happily everafter, but it could be worse. Hell, even Snape had mellowed out.

But …

Harry Potter was tired. He was tired and a bit disappointed, and if he didn't like living so much he would just end it all. But he did like living so he decided to try and live somewhere else. This didn't work as well as he had hoped. People did not feel like letting him go, and they always found him. Which was annoying.

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His friends were sad, but accepting. Okay, so not so accepting, but they all thought that he deserved a chance of something better, and if he, Hermione, and Luna said it was going to work then who were they, as pitiful mortals, to doubt it.

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They all stood there in a group, and they watched as he stepped forward. One look back and Harry Potter was gone from that world forever.

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Harry woke up, and he felt cold and some how unsafe. He tried to took around, but his neck was too weak to support his head. He tried too speak, but nothing resembling words came out. He was well on his way to freaking out, until he realized just what situation he had gotten himself into now.

_A baby, huh?_

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Lily Potter was not unhappy with her life per say, she was just feeling a little discontent. When she had finally said yes to James, she had more or less been humoring him. After her fallout with Sev, she had needed something to occupy her time; something that wasn't just books and research. A small part of her would also admit that she had wanted to hurt Severus, but she wasn't going to listen to it. The real point was that she did not really mean anything by it; it was just something to do.

James had turned out to be pretty nice, however, and they continued to date even after they had graduated. Before she knew it they were married…

Or that's how the story was supposed to go, but instead, before she knew it she was pregnant, and that changed everything.

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Its funny how a change in a sequence of events, can change the ultimate outcome. Or maybe it's not after all. Changing even the smallest action can affect the product. Technically the action didn't change as much as the processes and order, but in the end, those were just as important.  
The point is, Harry Potter was born a year early, and that changed a lot things.

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Both Lily and James realized that their relationship was at on steady decline and there was nothing that they could do about it. Oh, they tried; even James, (not the most responsible of blokes,) seemed to be putting in extra effort to be a… not jerk. They were parents now after all, though a bit more early than planned. They _had _been planning to get married before Lily had gotten with childe, but somehow it had kept on getting pushed off until they both realized that it wasn't going to happen. James was spending more time with Sirius or working than at home, and even Lily was trying to reestablish her relationship with Severus.

James and Lily were not going to be together for long, it was something that they acknowledge. They were not like Alice and Frank Longbottom, who's son Neville had recently been born, (on the same date as Harry; a happy coincidence.) They had lost that spark, or perhaps they had never had it. Right now the only thing that was keeping them together was Harry…and the war.

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Harry was a bit confused. One of many problems with being a baby: he couldn't keep track of information or what was going on in the world. But that wasn't why he was confuse at the moment. No, he was wondering about his parents and their relationship. Or the absence of said relationship.

His parents were not in love with each other.

They didn't seem to hate one another, but their relationship was that of amicable friends not a soon to be married couple. Like his and Ginny's had been. And that was another thing. They weren't married.

_What's up with that exactly?_ Harry may not have known much about his parents, but he knew that they had gotten married at least a year before he had shown up.

It wasn't until Neville had been born that Harry realized that something had definitely changed. And even this was not as big a surprise as when what was supposed to be _the_ Halloween had passed with … nothing.

_Okay~. Either Neville was born a year late or, more likely, I was born a year early. God, I've screwed things up again haven't I?_

_Well, it's probably fates fault anyway._

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The prophecy had been a shocker and not something Lily was wont to believe; it was obviously self fulfilling, with the cause and effect clauses. Lily had read enough mythology in her time to know that the best way to get by those was just to ignore them. It seemed, however, that the wizarding world once again put too much stock in such illogical things, and if Voldemort believed in blood supremacy for something like _**Magic**_, then he would definitely listen to the words of a prophet if he heard them, (even if that prophet was a crackpot.) Lily had no real doubt that he would. It was like a story book writing itself out, almost humorously cliché, if it hadn't involve her little Hadrian. NO ONE was going to get her baby without a fight.

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James would be the first to admit that he wasn't cut out for this father thing. Sure, he like Lily (liked, but maybe not loved,) and he did like the little brat, (who was adorable, if James did say so himself, and that was probably because he had gotten the Potter hair,) but could he actually take care of a baby? Everything seemed to be going faster than he had anticipated: they left school, he was in Auror training, Lily got pregnant, he was an Auror, the baby was born, he was promoted, the war leveled up. He had not gotten any time to think, and now a crazy mass murdering dark lord was after his son. Maybe everything wasn't as it was supposed to be, maybe what he and Lily had wasn't love and maybe they were not going to get a happily everafter, but there was always Harry, (or Hadrian if one must,) and there would always be Harry. No evil bastard was going to take him away, not if he had anything to do with it. James was a Potter, Harry was a Potter, and Potters protected their own.

* * *

So James Potter and Lily Evans, and Hadrian "Harry" James Potter moved to a quaint little house in a quaint little village, and under the protection of the fidelius charm. They had picked Peter as their secret keeper because it seemed like the less obvious choice, (especially since Harry didn't seem to like him all that much.) Hopefully this would keep them all safe, if what Dumbledore said was true. And now they could only wait until something happened, and possibly either Hadrian or Neville had vanquished the Dark Lord.

* * *

It was Halloween; _the_ Halloween, _that_ Halloween, not that anyone, but Harry knew it. Thankfully Harry could talk now, but he still had to tone down his diction. Was it going to be this hard to play down all of his skills? The best way he saw to avoid too much suspicion was to not talk that often. His mother only worried a bit, but she knew that he could ask for the things that he wanted. His father knew nothing of children, and thought little of it if Lily was not worrying. So, Harry had means to communicate, but should he?

This universe was very different and Harry couldn't assume that even this event would play out the same.

* * *

_God dammit, why did he have to go after Neville first? Why couldn't he just follow the script like he was supposed to? Why is Neville even here, and where the hell is that pitiful excuse for a father? Stupid Voldemort. Stupid Dad. Stupid hero complex. I really should have seen that shrink when I had the chance._

* * *

Lily had to make a decision. Her baby was unconscious in her arms and she was on the spot. Now, she liked the Longbottoms. They were nice and amicable people, and Alice had even been a friend while they still attended Hogwarts. Sure they had drifted apart, but Lily could say that in the heat of the moment, she could probably give her life for them and their child. But this was not the heat of the moment and it was _her _child's life.

Hadrian was her everything. Her comfort in the night, her little angel, her future. He was the buffer on which her relationship with Sev had healed. He was the product of both her and James, a remnent of their passion before it burned out. Hadrian was more important to Lily than anything, and when it came to his safety, there was nothing she wouldn't do, even doom another.

"It was Neville." Lily said slowly, as if in deep thought. "Voldemort came in here and cru-crucioed me. I couldn't stop him."

Lily paused, and James came over to wrap his arms around her. He could only think, _That bastard. If he was alive, I'd kill him again for this. _"He looked over the children to choose which one he would kill. In the end he picked Neville, I guess because Neville is a pureblood, or something."

"I see." Dumbledore murmured to the room. He took a closer look at Neville, brushing his hand against the jagged scar on his brow. "Then Neville is the only one who has ever survived the killing curse. Neville is the boy-who-lived."

Both Alice and Frank looked a combination of proud, nervous, horrified, and elated. Voldemort was finally gone, and their son had been the one to do away with him. But, there were still the death eaters.

Lily sat there looking down, as the world picked up again around her. She knew she had just done a terrible thing, but while she felt guilty, she couldn't summon up any regret. _I'm sorry, Alice. I'm sorry Frank, but it was for my baby. I'm sorry Neville, but my Hadrian is more important. I know I did a bad thing, but… I know I did the right thing._

* * *

_What the Fuck, Mom? _

_Oh shit, oh, God, gods, Merlin, Allah, Buddha, Kami. Fuck, Fuck, Fuck! !$$$!~!$^$$%% What just happened? What just-? AHHHHHHH.!_

_Fate, you fucking whore. I hate you, 'm gonna sick Death on yo' ass. ARHGGGGG!_

_Okay, I'm calm now. But things just got that much more complicated._

* * *

After his father and Godfather had died on a mission when he was 6, he and his mom had lived predominantly in the muggle world, with only periodic visits from 'Uncle Sevvy' to keep them in anyway connected. Uncle Remus sometimes visited on holidays and always sent gifts, but he tried to stay in touch through letter for the most part. Harry was happy with his life, and though he missed Sirius, he mostly missed his Sirius, who had had 12 years in Azkaban to turn him into not a git. Harry was sorry to say that he had grieved very little for his father; without the unconditional love of a child, he had barely even liked him. He was sad that he had missed the chance.

* * *

Harry was going to Hogwarts. His mother had strong reservations, and Harry did not necessarily disagree with them. He did not want to actually be at Hogwarts as much as keep an eye on things. But Harry did not think that he would help too much. Harry knew that it was cruel of him, especially since Neville wasn't actually the 'Chosen One', but he really did not want to deal with the fickle wizarding world again. He doubted he could even like the younger versions of his friends anymore. Besides, who was he to interfere when everything was probably very different. Snape was his uncle for Merlin's sake. In the end, Harry's decision was just a morbid curiosity of his.

No, Harry was going to hang back and watch. It might be interesting to see his childhood adventures from an outside perspective. But first he had to decide; was he going to be a Gryffindor again?

* * *

Shit, he was going to have to wait a year, wasn't he? What could he do with a extra year?

As it turns out, lots of things.

* * *

_If you put me in Slytherin I will set you on fire. No! Yes, I'm sure! Fuck off, I'm Gryffindor to the core. Shut up! Yes. Yes! FIRE! No! Not Gryffindor either. Ew, don't put me in Ravenclaw, I would die. Hey, I'm not that bad, besides that's bias. Do you get paid? Then it's not a job, put me in Hufflepuff. Old cloth burns real easy. Whatever, took you long enough. Stupid hat._

* * *

"_Not Slytherin, eh. Are you sure? Really? You are quite possibly the most slytherine Slytherin I have ever met been worn by. Even your way of going about being a Gryffindor is a bit sneaky. Are you really sure? Absolutely? Please reconsider. No, then better be _GRYFF- _Not that either. Look kid I like you, your smart and everything, but I don't think Ravenclaw is really right for you. Oh, so you don't want to be there either? I am not sicking you on poor, unsuspecting Hufflepuffs. I'm the sorting hat I'm allowed to be biased, that's practically my job. No, I don't get paid. UGHHH! Fine! I feel bad for the poor _HUFFLEPUFF!"

* * *

Harry had lived a relatively quiet life with Lily until now, **(AN: No, not really, it was just quiet for him, and Harry really isn't one to judge. He's been kicking ass, and learning how to kick more ass, but thems be the follies of a timeskip. You will never know his awesomeness.) **and the quiet did not end. He kept to himself, making few friends. He watched as a different Neville made friends with Ron, but not Hermione. It was weird.

Neville wasn't anything like his Neville. This Neville was a lot more confidant and more than a little spoiled. He wasn't nearly as bad as Malfoy was, (and still is, the annoying little bastard_, I guess those two won't be getting together again,_) but you could tell that he was used to getting what he wanted. It was really to be expected, but it made Harry wonder about Dumbledore and his scheming. Harry loved Dumbledore, (like an eccentric uncle/grandfather,) but he wasn't completely unaware of what a manipulative goat that Dumbledore could be. He practically stated that he did not want Harry growing up like someone like this Neville. Is that how Harry would have turned out if he had grown up in the wizarding world before? Would that have been better or worse? This Neville, for all of his confidence didn't seem as brave and strong as Harry's Neville. Harry had little faith in the guy, and it was a bit worrying. But not his problem.

Anyway, Harry had few friends, but the friends that he did have, he kept close and protected. He had decided to pick up Hermione, since all work and know play often lead her to collapse, and know-it-all-ism. And man was she annoying when she got like that. Harry also collected Luna and Colin when they showed up in school. Or perhaps they picked him up. Luna, Harry understood, but Colin was kind of weird. Just because he had to save his life when he went frolicking though the forbidden forest, [_Like an idiot. I mean, really, who does that? Not even for a good reason either, but to take pictures of the animals. Go back to following Neville or something,_] didn't mean that Harry wanted a new stalker. But since when has anyone ever listened to what Harry wanted.

There was also the passing acquaintances with the twins. Both pairs of them. Fred and George were still fun loving and mischievous. It made Harry wonder how the joke shop was going to go down; Neville didn't really seem too generous. There were also the Zabini twins: one boy, one girl, both hot as hell. The only reason they weren't mistaken for identical was because of their sexes. They were cool, from a family of darker grey, and allies, in away. Harry did not really remember them well from his own world. Harry was pretty sure there had been only one, and that he tended to stick to himself. Blaise **(AN: and I know it's cliché, but I think its cute.) **seemed to have his eye on Hermione, not that she noticed. Colin had a bit of a crush on Blaze, but Harry doubted that one was going anywhere. The Weasely twins were the Weasely twins. And Luna was….well….

Harry had his friends, and they were more or less known to the general populace for what ever reasons. He was not, however, and he liked that just fine.

* * *

Of course, all good things come to an end and so they did. It was fourth year. The year of the Triwizards Tournament, and probably what would be the year of the return of Voldemort.

* * *

Neville and pals had handled the last couple of years reasonably well, considering that the adventures seemed like watered down versions of Harry-tachi. Without Hermione, the whole philosopher's stone would have been a bust, if not for the fact that Neville had a more extensive upbringing than Ron, and simply knew stuff. Neville did not speak parsletongue, and Harry had convinced the basilisk to stop trying to kill people. Neville had brought the diary to Dumbledore, who realized what it was, and destroyed it. There was no Sirius in jail, but a prisoner who actually did want to kill Neville escaped Azkaban. His name was Peter, which Harry was pissed to hear. The Demetors did not stay for long since the Longbottoms would not stand for it. After Neville avoiding the death eater the whole year, Snape eventually was the one to catch him and said death eater, instead of immediately being given the kiss, was held for no less than three days, before escaping. _THREE FUCKING DAYS. WTF? If it had been Sirius, they would not have even thought about it. Actually, that doesn't make too much sense. The people seem to love Neville a lot more than they liked me. _Harry just drew it up as the people here being more overconfident and pompous. It seemed to be a regular enough occurrence. They were at least semi-competent, which was more than Harry could say about most of the people in his universe. Harry very rarely had to interfere at all.

But that was then, and this is now. The moment of truth. And of course, it didn't go well.

* * *

Lily was quite ready to leave as soon as it was rumored that the Dark Lord was back. There was so much that could go wrong. What if Voldemort remembered what happened that night? What if he didn't remember, and wanted Lily to tell him so that he kidnapped her Hadrian as leverage? What if…? What if…? Why were they even still there? They should be anywhere but England: anywhere, but Europe. They _would_ in the colonies by now if Hadrian didn't insist on finishing school at Hogwarts. At least he had decided that they could leave after he graduated. Lily would just have to make sure that it was on the same day.

* * *

Voldemort was back, and he was not going to waste any time. There was a pretty even split between the people who believed in his return or not. _So unfair, _Harry thought. Sure there was trash being spewed about him, but Neville also had a healthy number of people ready, willing, and able to support him. Not that either side was actually doing anything, and of course, the fact that Diggory supported Neville's claims was completely ignored by both of them. Harry was thinking of just packing up his things, throwing his plans to the wind, and hopping on the first mode of transportation off of the continent. Probably a plane, because he was did not want to even contemplate taking a port key across the pond.

But he couldn't leave yet. He had so many more things to prepare, investments and monies to move, and he wanted to make sure that his friends could be with him; or at least safe from the war that had more or less broken out. Secretly.

Voldemort seemed to be taking advantage of the free time that he had, and he also seemed more sane than Harry remembered. This made Harry anxious, because this was another thing that had changed, and without his scar, he didn't know exactly what was happening. Harry could only hope that everything worked out.

* * *

Blaise was in a conundrum. On one hand, his family was neutral. He was friendly with a Potter, (the heir too, with the passing of his 17th birthday,) two Weasleys, (who happened to be drop outs, if successful entrepreneurs,) a very loony girl (who was also a Lovegood,) and a mud-muggleborn, ( a muggleborn that even others admitted was weird. He was good at getting information though, the stalker). He was even dating one, (a smart, beautiful, fuzzy one). On the other hand, his family was less neutral then grey, and a dark grey at that. A really dark grey. If push came to shove, they would side with the Dark Lord, who would possibly want him to kill his girlfriend on principle. There was also the fact that that their parents might actually want to know what he and his sister did with their time, and who they spent said time with.

Blaze rather liked Hadrian, (because there was no way that she would call him something so undignified as 'Harry'). She admired him for his crafty mind and unassuming presence. She appreciated the care he had for his friends and how he treated them, even funding the twins(the Red one's) joke shop, which turned out to be a very good idea. But the point was that he would have done so even if he thought that they would fail. As soon as it was known of Voldemort's return, ( and even a bit before,) he was already planning a life somewhere else. He was also giving them all an option as well. Harry was a true friend, but he was also a danger to cross. Blaze was honored to be trusted as much as they all were with his secrets, and she also knew that if she or her twin betrayed them then there would be no place for them to hide from retribution.

Though almost no one knew, there were four sides to the war. More than Dumbledore's, the Ministry's and the Dark Lord's. The Italian twins had chosen theirs.

* * *

Everything had been going so well, how had it all come crashing down around him. It was his final year. His Final Fucking Year. Then he could have been gone; with his mother, with his friends. Now. Now! NOW! Everything was officially screwed up, and it was all Neville's fault. And Dumbledore's. But most of all it was Draco's fault, the spoiled little ferret. He couldn't leave well enough alone. _How was I supposed to know his father was part Veela? Pureblood, my ass!_

* * *

Harry had been minding his own business, mentally going over some plans, when Neville Longbottom, Ronald Weasley, and all of his other unimportant cronies came walking up behind him. It only shows how distracted he was that Harry did not actually notice their approach. To everyone else he just seemed all that more absentminded for not taking heed of the sudden silence and dim buzzing of whispers. Neville stood in place for more than a minute before he realized that Harry was simply not paying attention, instead of ignoring him. With a nod, Ron moved forward to tap him on the shoulder, but at the last minute Harry twitched away. Slowly he turned around to level the group with a cold and distant stare that had them flinching back before they could catch themselves.

Neville coughed, regaining his composure. He gave his most charming smile.

"Hullo, ah…" Neville paused seeming a bit hesitant. Harry sat there staring, which was starting to creep Neville out a bit, before he snapped out of it. With a minute shake of the head, Harry seem to see Neville for the first time.

"Oh, hullo," He said with a surprised voice even as his brain was working overtime. _What could Neville possibly want? We've never shared even a word together, and he's never glanced in my direction before. _Neville took Harry's small greeting as a sign to continue, and he did so with renewed confidence.

"My name is Neville, Neville Longbottom." He said rather unnecessarily, and slowly, as if he were talking to someone of a foreign language. "I'm sure that you've heard of the whole problem with V-Voldemort?"

Harry was suddenly aware of the fact that the whole hall was listening on their conversation, (they were certainly being quiet enough to hear it,) but he kept his face guileless and puzzled. He could practically hear their thoughts. _Gasp, Neville said you-know-who's name. He's so brave, but why is he talking to…Wait, who is that?_

"Um, yes." Harry muttered, wanting to shrink back. _Go away, Neville. Stop bringing notice to me._

"Well, I thought that since we are both from two ancient light family's, we should ally together against this common threat of darkness." Neville states proudly and far too loudly.

"I'm s-s-sorry?" Harry did not have to fake that stutter. _What the hell is this dumbass doing?_

"Well, you are the Potter Heir, right, and you came into your inheritance last summer?" Neville said questioned, frowning slightly. "I know because we share the same birthday, but you started a year Hogwarts a year late. The same year as me." _Shut up, dammit!_

"I don't really see-" Harry was cut off.

" Well, the Longbottoms and the Potters, along with the Weasely's have been the prominent houses of light for a while, right? But since your father died, the Potter kind of fell apart from us. It was only recently brought to my attention that you were the Lord Potter." _Dumbledore, you goat. _"We all need to come together in this time of darkness, so how about it? Allies?" Neville struck out his hand into Harry's face, and Harry was sorely tempted to try and rip it off. _Those words came right from your own mouth, huh, _he thought with derision.

Harry stood up, being sure to maintain his muted presents and shy tendency.

"I'm sorry, but I have to contact my uh, um…" _Lawyer, account manager, travel agent? _"Mother first. I can't m-make these kind of decisions without her. Um, bye." Harry said quickly, and with a few discrete signs to his friends, all but ran from the halls. _And once again things get more complicated._

* * *

"'I have to ch-check with my m-mummy.'" Blaise mocked with a snicker.

"Fuck off, if your not going to help." Harry snarled as he paced. Blaise only look on with amusement, but then again, Blaise always looked like that. His sister smirked.

"I doubt even half of the staff realized that you existed before today."

"Yeah, well now they all do."

"Is this going to be a problem, Harry?" Hermione asked, from Blaise's lap. "Now that Neville stated it in front of the whole school, everyone also knows you are the Potter heir."

"You showed uncertainty in front of the queen bee, Harry." Luna said looking uncharacteristically sharp. "Snakes can smell indecision. I fear the sattletelat will be hovering over you for some time."

"They might start thinking that you've been keeping it a secret for a reason," Colin chimed in. "They don't even know about the Black, or the Peverell, or the Slyther-"

"I know, guys," Harry said irritated. "I know."

"On the Brightside, love is about to attack." Luna says cheerily, and everyone pauses to look at her. "What?"

What, indeed.

* * *

Of course, less than a week later, Harry found out that he was Lucius Malfoy's veela mate.

Joy.

* * *

"Go away!" Harry shouted behind him as he speed-walked down the hall. He wasn't able to maneuver around everyone, but at this point he had stopped caring. Harry was just trying to get to his common room as fast as he could without outright running. And if anyone thought his behavior was out of character, they had no time to complain before he was too far away to hear them through the throng.

He needed to talk to his mother. For real this time. Maybe using the mirrors would be better, though Harry did not want anyone to know that he owned them. Firecalling was too traceable right now. Dammit, why did the universe seem to hate him. Malfoy had never even noticed him before Neville had to be a big mouth and point him out in front of the whole school. From then on Harry had somehow gained almost as many satellites as he had before ever coming to this universe/reality. Even his most dedicated ponce had come out to play, and it was actually a bit disappointing how very little his vocabulary had changed. "_Potty_" "_Orphan_" "_Pity_" "_My father_" Of course, to Malfoy it wasn't too old, but Harry would be lying if he said that it was not as annoying as fuck.

Malfoy had also found out about his relationship with Snape, which was so much more trouble than it was worth. Harry was sure that 'his father' would be hearing about that. Malfoy was more than curious, he was freakin' obsessing about this for some reason. Now, the fact that he was the Black heir was also out in the open and people were looking at him funny. As if he had not been there the whole time, and they had not been the ones to not notice. Of course, Harry had made an effort to keep this all a secret, but that was pure semantics. He was the same Harry as before, they were only just now seeing part of the truth.

* * *

_A veela! Really! The guy is fucking old enough to be my father, never mind that he's closer to my true age anyway, and admittedly pretty hot for an old guy. I am not dealing with this. I don't care that he is now legally divorcing his wife. I don't care if he would probably die. I am taking my Mom and we are leaving. Luckily, it's ridiculously easy to get off school grounds._

* * *

Unluckily, this Voldemort feels the need to show just how much smarter, (and sane, don't forget the sanity,) he was than the one back home. Harry could only hope that his friends had gotten away.

* * *

_Harry is my best friend. He is all of our best friends. He brought us together, and should know better than to think that we would let any snake bastard pull us apart._

* * *

"You guys are so fucking stupid." Harry said as he sat tied to a chair with his friends. They had come to save him, and obviously did not do the best job of it. _What are Fred and George even doing here? _Normally he would return the favor, but the circle of runes carved into the floor was making it a bit hard for him to access his wandless magic. The storm of emotions in him was also making it a bit hard for him to concentrate, which was key.

"We know, Harry." The group chorused.

"Did I also mention that you suck?"

"Yes, Harry."

"Was there any particular reason that you shouted out after_ slamming_ the door open?"

"That's what they do in the muggle 'mobies' that you showed us." This time only Neville answered.

"Hermione should have stopped you." On cue, everyone looked towards Hermione.

"I thought it would be cool." Hermione said, flushing bright enough to see in the dark lighting.

"Yes, well, it was pretty cool." Harry admitted with a smile. It twisted into a smirk. "It would have been cooler if you hadn't been stunned immediately after."

"We regret," began Fred.

"Nothing," George finished.

"If you have to be rescued," Blaze started.

"Then it must be done with style," Blaise continued.

_That was style? _Harry looked to Luna and Colin, but they just looked away with a huff and regal air. Luna then glanced back at him slyly.

"The whodinis tell me you're almost done with those bonds, Harry."

"Well, tell them to wait a second," Harry replied. "You can also tell them, that even though friends are often incompetent, they are also cool, if stupid, to rush into situations without a plan. Very Gryffindor."

"I will be sure to inform them." Luna said with a pleased smile, mirrored by all of the other faces in the room.

Harry was near to releasing the spell on them when the door opened, and the lights came on.

Lily Evans stood in a silhouette, with both Severus Snape and Remus Lupin at her side and a scowl on her face. "You are in so much trouble, young man. You will not be leaving my sights until you are married."

"Which might be sooner than you had expected." Snape said with a generally unpleasant face. Remus was already moving forward and pulling pars of chocolate from his pocket. Everything was better with chocolate.

* * *

"But Mum, I don't want to get married." Harry whigned, with an increasing pitch.

"Too bad." Lily said with a hard voice. "This could have been avoided if we had left after your forth year."

"Don't blame this on me," Harry said petulantly. "It's not my fault Voldemort decided to live up to his name."

* * *

_Not only is he smarter, (and more sane,) but he also looks better. _Harry thought as he glanced towards Voldemort, who sat on what could only be described as a throne.

"Vain too." Harry mumbled to himself.

"Excuse me, Mr. Potter?" Voldemort said with a hooded glare. Harry frowned and then pouted. _Just because I'm not the boy-who-lived anymore means I don't get a smile? _(Smile, smirk, whatever). _Does this mean we don't get to banter anymore?_

"Nothing, To- I mean, Vol… Mister Voldemort." Harry said not noticing the incredulous looks being thrown his way. "I was just thinking out loud."

"I did not realize that I was boring you."

"Oh, no it's okay."

* * *

Harry was a little mixed about this whole marriage thing. On one hand, his friends would probably be killed if he did not. Even if he could get away, that would take a hell of a lot more power than he would willingly show off, and he would be dead tired afterward. Or possibly just dead. There was also the whole wizarding world (of Europe, lets be honest,) riding on this treaty. A treaty between Voldemort and his desperate-rich-people-who-have-all-of-the-money-and-yet-still-feel-threatened-crazy-paranoia-being-a sign-of-inbreeding, and Dumbledore, his boy-who-lived, and the merry-band-of-sheeple. **(AN: A treaty mostly written by his mother, Remus, and looked over by Snape. Why did she get to write a treaty? Because she is very convincing, and enough of a doting mother that that even a Dark Lord would have to think twice. She can also hold a grudge.) **The boy-who-lived was portrayed as a forgiving peace lover, who decided that revenge was not the best course, and bridging the gap between the light and the dark could heal all wounds. The people who knew better also knew that they were trying to save their arses, but the public ate it up. Harry was once again struck by the difference between how he and Neville were treated by the public.

He would marry Lucius Malfoy, probably have some kids, and not try to escape the country for at least five years. There were also more political conditions, but Harry really did not care too much about those as long as muggles and muggleborns were not being killed or otherwise taken advantage of.

_Besides, Luscious is a pretty good catch._

On the other hand, Harry would be married, which kind of sucked. He would also be stuck in England, which was twice as bad. Harry would be the stepfather of a kid six months younger than him, who he kind of hated, and would actually have to put up with Voldy on a semi-regular basis. And would he be getting any glory? Noooo. There would probably be people trying to kill him, just to end the whole deal. Not that they could succeed, but damn, that was going to be annoying.

Right now, the only thing that Harry was looking forward to was the cake, and that was if he could make it through all of the preparations that all of his female acquaintances insisted on.

It was going to be a long three months, and the food better be worth it.

* * *

Holy shit, he was going to lose his virginity.

* * *

It was the reception and everything seemed to be going well. People from both sides were mingling, especially since the alcohol had begun to flow freely. Very freely.

The ceremony had gone well, better than expected even. Harry had been expecting a brawl at some point, and maybe a couple of duels to the death. Of course, the night was still young.

The wards had prevented any assassins or sabotagers from entering the grounds and tent. Voldemort had been on the sidelines not really interacting, Neville was the ring barer, and Dumbledore had presided over the whole thing. Everyone had kept to their own sides, and if there were any objections, nobody was stupid enough to say anything.

Severus gave Harry away now that everyone was aware that he knew the family, (wonder how he explained that,) and Harry' Maids consisted of Hermione, Luna, His mother, Blaze, and Colin, (who looked good in a dress, if the leers were anything to go by.)

* * *

Blah, blah, blah, together. Blah, blah, blah, treaty. Blah, blah, blah, happiness. Blah, blah, blah, magic. Blah, blah, blah, love. Blah, blah, blah. You may kiss your bonded.

_Damn, Luscious is good at this. He must have mad stillz in bed. I'm beginning to look forward to this whole wedding night thing._

* * *

So, it was all good. Until people started drinking. Then it got better. People were starting to make out in the corners including…_Was that Neville and Draco? Huh. I guess they do have a shot._

Harry drank with everyone else, always staying close to his new consort, who got agitated whenever there was a distance between them. Dumbledore was taking this time to subtly antagonize Tom, who had enough skill to throw it all right back. They actually seemed to be enjoying themselves. Sadists. People were dancing all around and having a ball. And drinking. And getting drunk. Drunk enough that Blaise decided to try and eat Hermione's face. Drunk enough that Luna started to actually talk straight. Drunk enough that Snape molested Remus, who blushed, but didn't put up much of a fight. Drunk enough that Colin was going to get some prime blackmail.

Drunk enough to loosen even the stiffest of the tightest of lips. Which Harry's mother did not have.

* * *

Lily leaned against Alice Longbottom, looking at her with glazed eyes and a guilty profile.

"I'm so shorwy, Alish." She said with a tremulous sigh as she began to sag. Alice was not holding up too much better. She had tried to limit herself, since they were in public and this was one of _the_ weddings of the century,(second only to her beloved Nev's.) The limiting had not actually worked, as the reception had started more than six hours ago and showed no sign of slowing down. She was lucid enough to hold Lily up, but only just.

"Whatcha you sorry abou?" Alice asks. If Lily is apologizing, then Alice should know what she is forgiving her for.

"Im schawwy fo ly'in 'bou Neville." Lily explains as she tries to stand up straight. Ordinarily this would have amounted to some suspicion on Alice's part, but now she was just curious.

"You lied abou Neville." Alice states, as if trying to understand.

"I ly'd te da world."

At this Alice has an epiphany of sorts. If Lily has lied to the world then she should apologizes to the world.

* * *

"Im sowwy, sho shawwy," Harry heard in the background. He wasn't really paying attention, to focused on drinking without choking as Lucius felt him up.

"I ly'd to da wirled." Lily cried out on the microphone equivalent. "Neville isn't de boy who kil'd tha guy. A beau-yful Hadrian iz. Mummy luvs you." Lily got out before she passed out backwards into Alice who giggled.

Suprisingly, this confession did not cause as big an up cry as it might have on other occasions. Almost everyone was too drunk or busy to hear, care, or remember. Unfortunately, the worse kind of sober people did.

Harry did a spitake into Lucius's face as he bent to kiss him. Lucius did not seem to mind as he had frozen midlean. Dumbledore was now looking more than a little dazed and confused. Voldemort did not look particularly surprised or bothered. And Harry knew, just knew, that things had just gotten that much more complicated.

* * *

"Is that true, Hadrian?" Lucius asked in shocked voice.

There were so many ways that he could answer that question, but the only thing that Harry could think was, _Fuck. I guess that wedding night is not happening then?_

* * *

**There you go.**

**Yes, I killed his father. I was going to make him an evil bastard, but it was just easier to get him out of the way.**

**Yes, I killed Sirius. He would have had no purpose in this story, and then you might have just wondered where he was. **

**Yes, he got with Lucius. I wanted it to be someone important enough to solidify Harry's position, and Draco was not cutting it. I don't really ship because Harry is the general Uke for his series and, to me, he goes with everything. **

**No, I did not kill off Ginny. Why? You will notice that I tried to portray everyone in a semigood light. I don't really believe in bashing. I believe in righting a story. If Ron needs to be a deatheater, Draco wears leather pants, Ginny and Sakura are bitches, and someone must die for my pairing, I am completely willing to bash their faces in. I did not need to in this story, so I did not. Nobody was perfect, nobody was the devil. Whatever. He was leaving the world on good terms. There was really no reason, when Ginny had no part.**

**Yes, Voldemort knew. He remembered after he had been resurrected. He wanted Harry to marry Lucius to have him (mostly) neutral, but always where Tom could watch him.**

******That ending came from no where. I am bad at them if you haven't noticed.**

**P.S.  
It actually occurs to me that leaving Neville to deal with the Voldemort despite the fact that he actually can't is a bit cruel. In other stories, it's pretty much something you can ignore as Harry get's the short end of the stick, but seeing as the role of the boy-who-lived was knowingly forced onto him by Harry's mother and Harry is more or less reaping the rewards, is Harry actually kind of in the wrong? Huh, pretty sure that's a plot hole. Not fixing it at this point.**


	4. Dark Lord Ash: Liberi

**MOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooo! I said I would update my Harry Drabble before the next chapter of my Hetalia thing, and I did. Actually I'm almost finish with that now too, so awesomeness to that.**  
**So any way, Harry is a Dark Lord in this story and he actually came off as a little pseudo-pedophilic, but he's not. He just likes children, and he always did want a big family. It's kind of weird actually, mostly because I'm bad when I'm not in sarcasm mode. And it's hard to write children. There might be a sequel to this, but probably not. Maybe more of an expansion.**

* * *

**.**  
**Dark Lord! Pseudo-Pedo! Family-Man! Evily! KindaCreepy!Harry**  
**. **

Being a Dark Lord wasn't all it was cut out to be. It was actually, rather like running a company. A large, and extended company, with branches around the world. It wasn't something that could truly be inherited, but had to be made from scratch. When you owned it all you had power and prestige. There were the people who had helped you get there, the people you might think of as family. There was also the sludge, and the mold; people who hung on for the ride, and stuck like particularly bad fungus.

And despite what people might think, one did not simply plan to be a dark lord. Like all actions, you started with an objective. You want to get something done, and it was always best to do it yourself. You wanted to protect your people from those who would fear and be a danger to them. You want to keep deep and vitally important traditions from being left behind and forgotten. Maybe you wanted to simply get ahead in the world after so many years of being stepped on. Or you decide to try to help and change a corrupt and dying society. To protect all of the others who could be hurt like you were because of less than understanding relatives.

The point was that sometimes things need to be done and you are the only one willing to do it. But then there are people who would fight against you. Maybe they think you are wrong, or more specifically, that they are right. You could be competition. They don't like you. People do not generally like change.

If given the choice most would remain stable and stagnant. Not necessarily a bad thing, but troublesome none the less. They have to be forced to move. Or just a little manipulation will do. Prey a little on their weaknesses. Or perchance simply their egos, which are by and large substantial enough. If they thought something was better than another: agree with them.

'Are we better off without muggles in our world? Well I never really liked them anyway.' 'You need a little money, well I need a little influence.' You never underestimate the power of a bribe.

And then, you hit a little snag. Something just a little beyond the moral event horizon. It wouldn't take to much to reach over and snatch. But you can't just reach. You must step. Just a little. Further.

And its yours.

Suddenly the world has just opened up to you. That little snagging guilt that has always persisted; you feel it burn away. And suddenly you feel free.

You look back to that world that doesn't have what you want. Or maybe it does, but there was so much weight before. It was so heavy and you simply cannot bear to pick it up again.

You may not know it now, but you are at a turning point. Whether you tried to inch back.

Or not.

* * *

Harry stepped over the bodies that littered the floor. He didn't bother to try to avoid the blood stained sections; that was more or less impossible. Besides, he like the way his footprints appeared in red.

The children must have awoken, because he could hear the pitter patter of small feet above his head. Harry had to smile at the sound; he loved children. They were really just so cute.

He wished he could have been so cute as a kid. He knew he had not been though. Harry imagined the picture he made; waif thin, ragged and oversized clothes, bent wire glasses.

Actually, that sounded almost adorable.

But he like this kind of adorable better. Harry could see the children at the top of the stairs looking down. They didn't have the character covered pajama's as muggle kid's tended to wear. No, these were night gowns in the traditional sense of the word, that dusted against their toes. All plump cheeks, and baby fat. The boy and girl, no more than six or seven, peered at Harry in curiosity. They had little sense of danger, definitely couldn't completely recognize the metallic scent of fresh blood for what it was, only slightly inquisitive of why he was in their house.

"Hullo." Harry said in a mellow voice. He was always astonished that such horrible people could create, beautiful beings. Pure souls even in their arrogance, ignorance, and cruelty. It quite hurt his head to think that we had all been children once. Beautiful children corrupted by simple existence. Life was a tragedy to be sure.

"Hullo, Mister." Said the girl. She was _almost_ hesitant, but only because he was somebody new.

"I was talking to your parents, but they hadn't mentioned they had such a cute little girl." Harry paused at the rail of the stairs, keeping most of his body out of sight. His "followers" were quiet, hidden away to wait for him. "Or a handsome young man. Perhaps you could tell me your name?"

The girl smiled happily, innocently, and she made her way down the stair. She tugged on her more shy brother, and one could observe the dynamics of their relationship. "My name is Samantha, but only Samantha. I don't like stupid nicknames."

Samantha expressed her displeasure with a face, and show of tongue. There was a pause as she stopped half way down. She looked over to her brother, tugging abruptly again on his arm when he withered to speak.

"My name is Jimmy." The boy said in a barely audible voice. He was definitely the quieter one, but also more observant. Jimmy wrinkled his nose at a smell that hung in the air. "Who are you ,sir?"

"I'm Harry Potter." Harry said gently, but genially. "I am going to be the taking care of you from now on. I hope that one day you may see me as your father."

Another silence hung in the air as the children seemed to take in the implications. A tilt of the head.

"But I already have a daddy," Samantha said confused. "And a mummy, Mr. Potter."

"Ah, but you see, there has been a terrible accident." Harry explained with a sincerely despondent expression. He looked away from the children, motioning with his eyes for Ron, Hermione, Neville and the rest to go. None of them had taken part in that nights activities, but they had been there to watch: give support. Harry did not usually enjoy inflicting pain on others, but as a Lord, he had to be ready to do his Duty. It was the little rewards, the children, that made it all worth while in the end.

He really did feel bad for the Sammy and James. To lose a parent was always a horrible thing.

They could all attest to that. After all, what were the Weasely's without an over-bearing mother or a father who was the very definition of a muggle lover? Where was the world without two more dentists? Without a strict grandmother? Without a loving aunt? A father with high expectations that you still wanted to accomplish, even at the expense of your happiness? A widow of a mother who loved you in her own way, because that was the only way she could?

Darker. Everything was so much darker. So barren.

Harry could only hope that he was as good a father as his friends and his family said. No child should ever feel unloved.

James, who seemed to thrown away his reserved attitude, came running down the stairs, but his hand had left Sammy's when she made no move. At least, until she brought it up to cover her mouth like her mummy did when she had heard something '_sca-del-lus_'.

"An accident?"

"Well, yes. I- " Harry cut himself off, as he bent slightly to catch James at the bottom of the stairs, but not before he saw…

Harry tucked James's face into his elbow, catching the back of his head in his palm and using his other arm to hold him close. He smiled sadly. "I really am sorry."

"What?" Sammy asked, she was anxious now; worried about her brothers silence and the man, who _was_ a stranger, holding him. "Jimmy, what's wrong?"

"Its nothing for you to worry about Sammy. Everything will be better soon." Harry looked down at the soft head of hair under his chin. His arm was starting to feel wet.

Harry lifted James's head to look into leaking eyes. They look so big, and wide and delightful that Harry couldn't resist giving James a kiss on the forehead and pulling him in for another hug. "Everything is going to be marvelous soon, and we'll so happy together. You'll see."

* * *

"_Obliviate"_

* * *

The house was reminiscent of Gordric's Hallow, if it had been super-sized. It had to be, with the amount of children that flowed from it. It had, on more than one occasion, been mistaken for an orphanage, but Harry never minded. Children might have been left on the door step in hopes of finding a family that would eventually take them away, but they would never belong to another family. They were Potters. Their father was Harry Potter. Their aunt's and uncles included Ronald, Hermione, Neville, Draconius, Susan, Luna, Fred, George, and Dennis Potter. They only had one grandparent, but Grandpa Hagrid was big enough to love all of them.

And they were happy.


End file.
